If you're a single guy still looking for your dream girl, I'm sure
you've absorbed lots of advice on how best to meet and date women by now. A lot
of it is "common sensical" as you well know. Check this out…
Therefore, assuming you know enough not to show up on a first date
looking like you just combed your hair with an M-80 or wearing cowboy boots and
shorts, maybe a few of the following ideas can give you just enough of an edge
to make the difference between Date #2 with an exciting little fox -- and a
date with ol' Rosie Palm instead. Check these out:
Can she trust you to ever be
a good future father? Don't laugh, unless she's middle-aged and well beyond the
kids & husband phase of her life, this "mating calculus" is
ALWAYS running somewhere in the back of her mind.
Acting like a phony with an
obviously fake 'come-on' personality only demonstrates how easily you are
willing to embrace deception in order to get something you want. To any woman
other than the sad exception of the chick who's looking for another loser for
her next AA reclamation project (maybe 10% to 15% of the female population),
you are TOTAL POISON. A potential cheater and heartbreaker just waiting for his
next victim to arrive.
She may dump you right away,
OR depending on the depth of her general bitterness towards men, keep you
around to engage in a little recreational tease and torturing if she's got a
vendetta to settle with a guy like you. Beware!
It's easy to get caught up
in the "talking trap" on a date -- where the two of you sit around
and get lost in deeper and deeper conversation. These 'chatting dates' can slip
out of control and become subtle passion-killers though, especially if you're
not careful to keep the big picture in focus. Before you know it, you're
spilling your guts about Father Hamhands from your altar boy days or waxing
poetic about your hemorrhoids and how they love to swell up in the springtime.
Yeesh. As Joey from the TV show Friends once scolded his buddy Chandler,
"... ok, that's TOO MUCH information!..."
For a seduction to go off
like a thing of beauty, you must reveal yourself SLOWLY -- bit-by-bit -- as you
gradually come to know her. Think of dating as an emotional veil dance... a
striptease -- the point of which is to make her anticipate when the next Veil
of Male Mystery will come off! This is the kind of thing she's been DREAMING
about all her life. Why? Because it makes everything that's to follow
(including the sex) all that much more delicious for her.
So put ACTION ahead of
endless yakking. Stay active on a date (it doesn't have to be an extreme
sport-fest or anything, just visiting a flea market will do...) so that you are
BUILDING a memory with her instead of SHARING one. Focus on having experiences
with her that the two of you can reminisce about some day in the future --
instead of spending time caught up in a lot of drawn-out amateur psychotherapy
sessions in a bar somewhere.
Conversation is very
important in any new relationship, and is the pathway to her eventual sexual
surrender, but you must provide her with a REASON to want to know so much about
you *FIRST* before opening your soul. Never forget the importance of your veil
dance.
The point of conversation
should always be focused on drawing HER interests out instead of dwelling on
your own (but don't come across like a ruthless Nazi interrogator -- go easy on
the unbroken string of questions). Share a little -- but keep YOUR interests
lost in the background.
Her response to a few casual
queries about her life or current dreams holds clues to your *LifeLine*. Cling
to it tightly and work on expanding its scope. Submerge your own ego for the
first few dates. Don't worry, when you finally hook her she'll begin
questioning you intently... maybe TOO intently! But that probably won't happen
until after you've had sex. (Then get ready for the onslaught!)
The standard dating advice
of "being yourself" or "acting like yourself" (whatever the
hell that means) is pure "Oprah-istic" B.S.
Learn to strike a balance
between coming on like a phony-baloney (which we talked about earlier), and
seeming too safe and friendly. Seduction is a delicate bubble that can be burst
with increasingly less effort as it ripens. A first date is NOT the place to
remain in the role of your everyday average old sort of guy... that's spells
B-O-R-I-N-G. A spark must be present to ignite the *fires of desire* in the old
primal portion of her brain.
So that means you have to be
EXCITED to be out with her! When you think about it, it should be easy to get
juiced up... dating someone for the very first time is not something that
happens every day in anyone's life. Face it, ordinary life sucks.
Romance is a fantasy voyage,
an escape from the 9 to 5 daily drudgery of work, etc. Treat this rare event
for what it is... something unique, unrepeatable and potentially unforgettable.
Even if she seems too cool to care, trust me... her romance motor is humming
along in high gear.
Learn to always keep your
movements around the women you're trying to seduce graceful and deliberate like
a snake charmer. Modulate your voice in a throaty style (lowered volume) and
keep the tone of your words sounding a little bit "conspiratorial"
(without going overboard and making a fool of yourself). A squeaky voice spells
fear and sounds adolescent, so strive to keep it in check. Be self-aware.
Proclaiming ridiculously
inappropriate nonsense like "...I love you" or "You're the girl
I've been searching for my whole life..." on a first or second date is the
frightening talk of the potential stalker. You become RADIOACTIVE to women once
word of your engaging in this kind of bizarre behavior spreads. And it will
spread... women gossip like demons. So chill the subservient groveling and act
like you've been down the dating & mating road a few times already.
Women can become mesmerized
by men who seem to be captivated by them. But this kind of 'vibe' can only
shine through your body language if it's GENUINE -- and for that to happen, you
have to believe that she will respond favorably to you... *no matter what*.
Remember... ATTITUDE +
UNCONSCIOUS BELIEFS = THE TRUTH.
Your attitude is a naked
expression of your unconscious beliefs about yourself. Therefore, it is
interpreted BY OTHERS as revealing the absolute truth about you... whether YOU
like it or not. Control the self-image that you project to the world by pushing
the crappy beliefs about yourself out of your brain, and replace them with
empowering ones that will advance your own personal 'cause' for a change.
Strive to deliberately manipulate this critical part of your consciousness, and
watch your world change before your eyes like magic.
Before long, you'll soon
have your pick of all the best looking women in YOUR world!
Source: http://www.sosuave.com/articles/essential.htm